Graduation season is a lot of fun

Chiang Mai has some great spots for date night

Taking a (small) leap

Greetings from Thailand!  

Welcome back to our series on building a better life! 

I love writing these.  It encourages and challenges me in my own life.  I hope you find something encouraging and challenging for your life too.  

Remember:

None of us has arrived; we are simply seeking to build better, together.  

An important part of that journey, is the frequent reminders that we are loved at every stage along the way.  

Building a better life is never about earning, but enjoying and edifying (building up others). 

Especially on this topic of taking the leap, it is vital to have a strong confidence that you are loved.  
Because sometimes you will leap and fall.  

In that moment it is essential to know failure is not a punishment or a permanent condition, but merely a teacher.  

A consequence is never a value statement about your worth, only about your choices.  

Your value never changes, but your enjoyment of your own life, and your ability to positively influence the lives of others does.  

That's the part we want to build.   

Some of the most significant turning points of my life were failures.  

But more often than not, when you take a calculated risk to improve your life, you will see improvement, and improvement is success. 
 
It turns out 90% of what we fear never happens.  

But 100% of what you don't try never happens. 

So take the leap and discover how calculated risks can improve your life.  

I made so me new friends on a recent trip

I am always impressed and grateful for quality educators who are genuinely trying to help their students

Some fun at a school in the mountains

It takes a village

This all starts with love.  

Love is: to will and work for the welfare of another.  

This is what God is always doing in our lives and what we want to be doing too.  

When we help someone else, or make improvements in our own lives, we are joining the work of God in helping build better lives and hence, a better world.  

Building a better life is essentially about making adjustments in our thinking and living so that we can join with God in seeking His best for us.  

A very long time ago a man named Irenaeus said:
"The glory of God is man fully alive." 

That is our goal. 

We are not aiming to be better than anyone else. 
Only to be the best version of our selves,
who we were made to be,
enjoying the life we were made to live,
offering our gift to the world.

Fully alive, with abundant Life.

Thank you to our volunteers for helping paint our dorm!

You can make a lot of friends in 42 years of ministry

So thankful for this family!

You build your life one decision at a time. 
To become the best versions of ourselves, we have to take some leaps.  

Taking the Leap Step 1:  Own your responsibility

I work with people every day who have unfairly, unjustly suffered from the actions of others. 
It is sad, it is unfair, it is not right. 
I have compassion for them, but not pity.   

Pity says "You poor thing.  How sad that happened to you."

Compassion says, "I am sorry that happened to you, how can we get you to a better place?"

Pity looks for someone to blame. 
Love looks for a way forward.    

Rather than trying to figure out who is to blame, we can give our attention to how we can improve our situation.  

At the end of the day, that is what matters---not just what happened to us, but what we are doing with what we have.  

Telling people they are merely victims disempowers them. 

We want to empower, not disempower ourselves as well as others. 
The first way anyone does that is to take responsibility for their own life.  

Not everything that happened to you is your fault, but your life is still your responsibility. 
Don't give up that responsibility, because it is also your power.  

We love the Somtam Slider!

Thankful!

Some of the triathlon crew!

I don't like to give up my power, even if I am a victim of someone else's actions.  

If I share some responsibility for my circumstances, that can be discouraging. 
But it is also empowering. 

If I can be blamed, then I have the capacity to change.  

If I have to power to make mistakes, it means I have power to make choices, and if I have the power to make choices, I have the power to change my circumstances.

So no matter where you are, no matter what has happened, no matter what may be wrong with us, we have some power to change.

And that is where we have to start. 
There are lots of things you cannot control, but there are some you can. 
Start there.  

You are one-of-a-kind, and you have lived a one-of-a-kind life. 
Nobody has had all of your life experiences. 
So there is no comparison with anyone else.   

Take responsibility for the parts of your life that you have messed up. 
Then make better choices.  

A crappy life discourages us.  But a mistake we learned from can inspire us.  

Some of my biggest mistakes became my best teachers.  

Endless curiosity its part of a good life

So proud of our friend this couple

Children's Day perks in Thailand

Taking the Leap Step 2:  Don't Get Too Comfortable

Any family that has multiple children, always has a responsible child (usually the firstborn) and a reckless child (usually the youngest).  

As hard as it may be for parents to admit, both of those personalities have advantages.  

Being too cautious can be just as bad as being too reckless. 

The consequences may vary, but in both cases we can end up living a life we don't enjoy and that doesn't do much to benefit others.  

Everything that becomes a habit has the potential to become a hindrance. 

Habits are so important to a healthy, thriving life, but even they can become a trap.  

Golden handcuffs are still handcuffs (credit Dave Pound, thanks Dad!).  

We talked last time about the importance of doing what you need to do, until you can do what you want to do.  

There is a season for hard work, and hitting the grind, and yes, earning money.    

But that is not a life.  It is means for a better life.

Many people get trapped by failure and they don't thrive.  

But many more people also get trapped by success.  

True success is not measured with dollar signs, but the combination of joy, peace, and purpose---a life well lived.    

DMX, the late rapper, once sang this line:

"The true measure of a man is not what he does for himself but what he does for someone else"

Financial success feels good. 
It's addicting because its affirming---we are successful, we are valuable, we are important.    

Our financial obligations only seem to grow with time---a spouse, children, a home, etc.  

But sometimes financial success can actually hinder our greater purpose.  

Don't let the fruits of success blind you to the costs.
And don't let progress in one area of your life, lead to decline in others.    

Life is too precious to spend it merely getting money.  
Don't let success make you stuck.  

Interns and Elephants!

Triathlon assistant

Support squad

Take the Leap Step 3:  Calculate the Risks and Rewards

We need to change the way we evaluate what makes a good life.

A good life is not a good job.
A good job is not a good salary. 

Life is so much more than how much you make. 
But it is also more than just what you like doing.  

Frederick Buechner sums life up like this:

“The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet.” 

What if that was our new calculation?

Does what you spend the majority of your time doing make you deeply glad?
Does it contribute to the well-being of our world?  
Does it meet the needs of others?

Notice I didn't ask if it was easy, or without stress. 
I didn't ask how much it pays.   

This is a good time to calculate the risks and rewards of seeking such a life, versus staying where you are.  

Both have consequences, both have costs and rewards.  

We have been doing a lot of hosting this month

Our kids have Thai class on Wednesdays with friends

Audrey reached a major milestone this month, she bought her first set of 2nd hand tires Her dad would be very proud

Here are some questions you can ask yourself:

1. Is money helping me move forward in my life, or holding me back?

2.  Are the things I own freeing me, or burdening me?

3.  Does my work bring me deep gladness?  Why or why not?  Could it?

4.  Does my work make the world a better place?  How?

5.  What is the risk of taking a leap and trying something new?  What could I lose?

6.  What is the risk of staying where I am?  What could I miss?

7.  Who else is affected by my choices?  How do they feel?  

When you have calculated the risks and the rewards, make a choice and follow it through. 

Then no matter what happens, you have taken a conscious role in directing your own life. 
What happens next is your responsibility.  

Yes, that can be scary, but it is also empowering.    

Life is full of leaps.  

The hardest is generally the first.  

You can always change again.  But if you never take the leap, you will never change.  

Pizza at the Pounds!

Date night with this beauty

Really thankful for our neighbors Grandpa Gox and Grandma Omi

Take the Leap Step 4: Learn from your Leaps

You may need to be patient. 
You may need to fail.
You may need to learn hard lessons. 
But those aren't bad things, just hard things, and there is a big difference.    

Bad things only make you worse.
Hard things often make you better.   

It will be scary.  It will be risky.  It may be hard.  It may not work out.  

Do it anyway. 

Even if it doesn't work out as you hoped, you gained something valuable.  You learned that it's ok to try and fail.

In a word, you have gained resilience.  

You learned that you can get up and try again.  

That breaks the hold of the fear that so often holds us back. 
The unknown isn't so unknown anymore.  
Been there, done that, overcome that.    

Hard working crew!

So proud of Rhoda!  She graduated 9th grade and is on to High School

Staff meetings need some game time too

Progress is not always linear or consistent.

In my own life, there are lots of slow seasons where it seemed like nothing much was happening, and then a big break through.  

Other times, it was like things were changing daily.  

Be ready for both.  

There is joy in both. 
You may have to work harder to find it at some times than at others, but it is there.  

So long as there is progress, there can be joy.  

What leads us to is despair the feeling that things will always be this way.  

But when we take leaps, make changes, we are proving that things can change.  

Hope is believing that things can get better, and that our choices and decisions can help us get there.  

Fon and Naa graduated high school, and Laura graduated 9th grade.  Look out world!

Celebrating 42 years of ministry for our Thai Pastor with some special music

We have some great board members!

Why We Leap

Taking periodic leaps, breaks the cycles we get stuck in, even the successful cycles, and brings us closer to our purpose.  

To discover the purpose of our life, why we were made and what we were made for, is one of the greatest joys in life.  

When the things that bring you the most joy, are also the things that most benefit others, then our life is near to God's design for it.

The devil's logic is that whatever our neighbor gains, must come at our loss.  
But God's logic says our neighbor's gain can be our gain too.  

It takes faith to pursue a meaningful life.  

We have to believe that a good life is possible, that we possess tools to help us find it, and that a good life need not come at anyone else's expense.  

Taking a calculated risk in that direction, a leap, is a declaration of faith and hope. 

And whether we fly or fall, we will learn, we will grow, and we will change.  

If despair is about being stuck, hope is about movement.  

Keep hoping, keep moving.   

You are not alone.

Building with you,

Matt, Audrey, Ezra, and Sienna

Biker Babe

Our friend Lily giving Sienna sparkles in her hair

The reason Audrey and I are so tired and happy