Staff Retreat Fun

The competition was fierce...

Pen getting low to help the team!

Greetings from Thailand!

I love to hike.  I just love being in the mountains.  But in the midst of even the most breath-taking scenery, we can miss the glory because of a tiny, unimpressive pebble in our shoe.

Life is sometimes like hiking with a pebble in your shoe.

There is glory all around us, but we can't see it because of some small, irritating annoyance.

And if we are not careful, the stone can blot out the sun.

There are seasons of life where it feels like we are walking through a gravel pit.

There is always something hindering us from being able to just enjoy the day, the moment, the present; whatever circumstance we may be in.

And as soon as one pebble is expelled, a new one takes its place.

This is an incredibly exciting, and fun season of life for us in Thailand.

We love this country and the people.

We love Faithful Heart, and the people we are blessed to work alongside.

We love our children and seeing them grow and develop.

We love being parents and having a son.

And when we step back and survey the last few years, we can see God's fingerprints all around us---even on us.

And that is a great feeling.

Most of us lose that feeling somewhere along the way, usually about midway through childhood.

The exhilaration of being alive, and being excited for the future fades into the harsh realities and pressures we experience as adults.

Most of my adult life I have struggle with that loss.

And even now, all those good things can be overshadowed by one small stone.

One little thing which worries or annoys or frustrates me.

My whole focus turns to this small, insignificant thing in my life and I miss the glory around me.

We take our games very seriously at Faithful Heart

These girls were excited to get custom made dresses from a kind woman in the US!

10 Year Anniversary at Faithful Heart!

One of my regrets is that I did not enjoy the different seasons of my life more as I was in them.

And I let the small rocks in my shoes keep me from enjoying what was good, unique, and fun about that season of life.

It is rule of life in general, that we will always have something which bothers us.

Something will not be the way we would like it to be.

But this is the secret of the Christian idea of self-denial.

You let go in order to have.

You deny in order to receive.

Despite all the crazy abuses and wild ideas about self-denial, at the heart of it is happiness and freedom.

Anyone who has ever set a goal, then achieved it, knows this truth.

Sometimes you must look past the stone in your shoe (read: those small, annoying, not-really-that important, things) and just enjoy the gory of life going on all around you.

Pastor Steve talking about loving teenagers!

Ezra and Mom working with clay

Audrey's cool Crossfit shirts may be a copyright violation...

 To be sure sometimes, we should just stop and remove the stone(s).

But other times, it may not be possible to remove it, so we need to learn to enjoy life with it.

Nothing is more dangerous to our happiness than requiring everything to go our way before we will be happy.

Life in another country often means we face some daily frustrations, misunderstandings, and bewildering circumstances.

One of the keys to enjoying living here, is that we learn to live in the big picture, not among the small stones.

But it is true wherever you live.

Turn off the news, log off facebook, and experience the glory of the life all around you.

It is a change in perspective, and a secret of many people who have very little, but posses great happiness.

Don't let the bad spoil the good.  

There is good around us.

We have to determine to find it and enjoy it.

Iron Bridge at night

Home of Faith Girls came to say goodbye to Dave & Shirley before they head to America

Joshua finally has his diploma in hand---4 years of hard work!

Contrary to what passes for a lot of religion and Christianity, Jesus proclaimed a message of incredible optimism.

Despite living in a culture at least as violent, (often much more) than ours, he announced good news for all who would hear him:

A different life is possible, right in the midst of your present life.

No matter where you are.

No matter who you are.

And the key to that optimism was a confidence that God liked people, and was ever and always working to make them whole, happy, and flourishing.

Life was not a random blend of good and bad befalling us by chance, but the conscious effort of a kind Father to give a good life to His children.

If we believe that, we begin to take good for granted, and that is the way it should be.

We begin to expect good.

This is the often unsaid conviction of anyone who works to improve life for others:

Life ought to be a good thing.

And it is right that we think so.

We cannot control the stones in life, but we can control where we fix our attention.

There are times to focus on the stones, but never only on the stones.

We grieve orphaned children, but we rejoice in the potential of every human life.

We despise cancer, but we celebrate relationship, and love.

We get irritated by circumstances or people at work, but we delight in the sunrise and a good laugh with friends.

And we never let the stone in our shoe, blot out the glory all around us.

Thank you for walking with us, supporting us, praying for us, and sharing the glory of life!

Swimming lessons from Tiida!

Not sure who is in there...

Fun times with our staff

Please keep these things in your prayers:

1.  We are submitting paperwork to purchase the land for Faithful Heart!  There is so much potential and so many decisions to be made.  Pray we would use it to bless many lives here.

2.  Our directors, Dave and Shirley, are headed to the US for several months.  Pray for Matt as he gives leadership here.

3.  Pray for new house parents!  We are interviewing several couples and eager to open a new home for girls.

4.  Pray for opportunities to help some widows keep and care for their own children in our community.  Single Mom's are amazing, but it is hard work!

5.  Pray for our time in America this summer!  We will be in Ohio June 14-18th, then to Pennsylvania, then to visit First Baptist Church in South Carolina, then to Colorado for most of July.

Early morning banana at the staff retreat.

One cool crew!

This adorableness barely got past the censors

Do you see it?

I See It!

Smoggy mountains are still pretty

Happy Thai New Year!  

It has been a full season of life, and a good one.  Life for our family in Thailand is ever evolving.  There are great days, and hard days, and lots of just normal days.  But stepping back a bit, we feel incredibly blessed as we consider the past, and incredibly excited about our future in Thailand and at Faithful Heart.  



Have you ever woke up from bad dreams and felt that overwhelming sense of relief that it was, after all, just a dream?

I feel like seeing God is sometimes like waking from a bad dream to a welcome relief.  

We encounter something even more real than our problems: Goodness Incarnate.  

It is not closing our eyes to suffering, but opening them more fully.  

In our 3 years in Thailand, more and more I feel like I am waking to a better reality.  

And the result is I feel less and less afraid, and more and more full of anticipation.  

There is a world of difference between waking up to a world of vague hopes and fears, and waking up to a world where Goodness dwells all around you.  

Mien Church Easter Camping trip

The Tuk-tuk crash grame

Some Special Friends went on an adventure with us!

Do you ever find yourself almost expecting bad things to happen, even when things are going well?

I am often like an anxious mother, just waiting for something bad to happen so I can vent the fear in my heart and say; "See, I knew it, it was bound to happen!"

We stress about stress that isn't even here yet.

We fear what might never happen. 

You may have seen the quote-- "90% of what we worry about never actually happens."  

Part of the problem is that you can't argue with the 'what ifs.'

How do you disprove an imaginary fear, any more than an imaginary person?

And expectation often brings about what it expects.  

If our faith has any substance to it at all, it ought to teach us the opposite: 

To Expect Good.

One advantage of meeting people completely different from you in culture and language, is discovering that happiness is possible in situations and circumstances completely different from our own.  

It helps us see more of God's largeness.  

And His goodness. 

If happiness is not a set prescription, but found in endless variety, then we too can have it.  

Honoring your elders on the New Year...(I am sure Steve and Becky were mistakenly put with the old folks).

Dear Friends visiting from our Asian neighbor.

Thai culture has much to teach us.

Expectation has a lot to do with our happiness, and the good news is, it is something we have influence over.

Our circumstances may be beyond our control.

Relationships may be beyond our control.

But expectation is in the mind and heart, and there we do have some control.  

What if you chose to view everything that happens to you today as a kindness from one who loved you?

Maybe some things would be impossible. 

But what about the rest?

What if the sun rise was painted for your pleasure?

What if the cool breeze was a gift to make you smile?

What if a flower blooming was a lover wooing you?  

What if hysterical laughs with your friends over coffee was an intentional design to encourage you?

What if that book was given to for just this time?

Celebrating 10 years at Faithful Heart!

Can't celebrate without some delicious food!

Family time in the Mountains.

How we choose to view our world, has a powerful impact on how our circumstances shape our happiness. 

It costs us nothing to expect good.

And we are not delusional idealists to do so.  

In fact, I think the more we practice this, the more true our perception of reality becomes.  

We may not realize it, but we have been trained to expect bad things, trained to worry and fear.  

There are industries and interests that profit greatly by our fearful expectations.  

We may have to start by undoing what has been done.  

But what freedom there is in enjoying each day, without fear of tomorrow!

Life is like Christmas, we go through unwrapping God's gifts to us.  

Celebrating a great lady's Birthday.

Celebrating Great Friends!

Celebrating the love of my life!

And when sorrow comes, we meet it.  

But it is not the rule, it is the exception.  

How many days of health do we typically enjoy for every one day of sickness?

So we wake each morning and we look for God's face.

His face in the sunrise, in the face of our family.

We look for His face in the poor and the hungry.  

And when we see Him, we wake from the dream.  

He is here.

He has not left.

He has not changed.

We expect good, because we expect God.  

Hot Spring, Hot Tubs (look closely at the center tub).

This little guy has been a champ.  Lots of adventures and he has discovered car sickness like Mom & Dad.

Ez & Dad love the Creek.

These wonderfully busy weeks have held:

An Easter camping trip with our Thai friends at the Mien Church.  

A New Year Festival and a water fight.  

A 10 year anniversary, and a staff retreat. 

And special visitors from America--Steve and Becky Storkel.

It has been a busy, fun-filled time for all of us.  Ezra has been such a champ.  As some of you may have heard, he will soon be getting a little brother or sister!  Audrey is 13 weeks pregnant and we are growing more excited to meet this new addition to the family.  

We keep moving ahead slowly with the land project.  We are submitting paperwork this week.  Please keep that in your prayers.  

Dave and Shirley are preparing to go to America in May for 6 months.  Continue to pray for wisdom for Matt as he gives leadership and direction while they are gone. Matt has been officially designated the Assistant Director at Faithful Heart and is very honored to serve in this way.  

Thank you for your prayers, love and support!

Much Love, 

Matt, Audrey, Ez, & Baby #2

New Baby!

The Hobbit could have been in Thailand

Ready Dad!

A new discovery downtown!

Learning to celebrate Song Kran right!

Joshua is a proud graduate, and we are proud of him!  The first in his family.

The little ham isn't shy.

Often it seems we are forced to learn the things we teach.

 It is all very good to say that living well requires humility and mystery.  That sounds quite nice and even exciting.

And it is.

But there are the not so pleasant sides as well.

Nothing is more difficult for the human mind to make peace with than the knowledge of not knowing. 

Simple put, nothing is more difficult than knowing that you don't know what to do.

It is a kind of pain we wish to make go away as soon as possible.

"Surely there is some information, if I could just get a hold of it, everything would become clear..."

"There must be an easy answer out there somewhere, someone can tell us exactly what to do in this situation..."

But there often isn't.

Activity can be a relief compared to waiting.

The sense that we are "doing something about this" is a great comfort, even if it is not always great help.

Honesty requires courage to see what we would rather not see.

Humility is simply a form of honesty.

That is why it can be so unsettling.

When we are honest about our shortcomings, our limitations, our faults and mistakes, and yes, even our ignorance, we are in a truly frightening place.

And fear can lead us to some tragic mistakes.

We either chose denial and self-delusion because it is easier to feel keep feeling good about ourselves, or we choose to be honest about our shortcomings and accept help.

Whether as an employee or a spouse, or a parent, or son or daughter, we will all be confronted with circumstances which have no easy solution.

Here in Thailand, we frequently find ourselves beyond our ability or wisdom.

And often, when we are honest, we find ourselves saying those great and terrible words:

"I don't know what to do."

We had a lot of fun with my Uncle Doug and Aunt Cathy!

Some new friends have been great helping us do some computer training for our staff.

Mark and Ruth have graduated Middle school and are headed to High School!

So what do you do, when you don't know what to do?

I have a brief summary:

1.  Wait
2.  Listen
3.  Invite other opinions
4.  Act in trust, not certainty

Years ago, I met with a Spiritual Director.

A Spiritual Director is someone who helps you think through things well.  They virtually never offer advice or tell you what to do.  They simple help you sort out your thoughts, look at them objectively and make your own best decisions.  (If you have never tried this, I highly recommend it.)

My Spiritual Director had studied St. Ignatius deeply and introduced me to a process of discernment that has been a huge help to me over the years and something I use almost daily in my life.

And the secret of this ancient deep wisdom is summed up in one word:

Wait.

(And don't make any major changes in your life when you are not at peace).

Just wait.

If you are like me, you are already objecting, "But some things can't wait.  We have to do something!"

There are some exceptions, to be sure, but more often than we think, you don't need to do something.  You need to wait.

Joy, the lovely Bride!

The lovely brides maids!

Morning run for bananas!

Think about how different your life might be if you never let stress, fear, or anxiety make a decision in your life.

If you refused to be bullied by the 'tyranny of the urgent' and learned to wait, not chiefly for clarity, but for peace in your own spirit, how might it change your life?

This is not procrastination.  (That is the fear to act.)

This is the refusal to act in fear.

We wait because our thoughts are most clear when our hearts are most peaceful.

Waiting also allows us to listen.

Have you ever noticed how stress literally seems to block your ability to think?

I often think of prayer as learning to think with God.

As we wait, we make the conscious decision to not act, which relieves the stress of the moment, and enables us to listen and to think instead.

God is always speaking, we are just not always listening.

But God is not usually speaking specific instructions, but presence.

In college I sometimes prayed during a test, "O God, what is the answer to question number 34?"

God would quietly whisper to me:

"To study more before the test.  And to trust that I will be with you whether you pass or fail."

But listening opens us up.

You can't relax with a clenched fist, or a clenched mind.

Fuzzy brings the intensity!

Grandpa and Grandma playing catch.

Becky excited about some Samaritan's Purse gift boxes!

Waiting is not easy. Nor is asking advice.

But both are vital to living well.

None of us is an expert in everything.  And all of us will face circumstances and decisions that require something we do not possess.

We either bluff our way through blindly, or we humble ourselves and ask the advice of others.

The first way causes untold heartache, to ourselves and to others.

The second is the path to wisdom.

Advice is not orders.

We are not bound to follow any advice we receive.

But by inviting other perspectives, we are safeguarding ourselves.

Far more often, our decisions suffer from a lack of information, rather than a surplus.

You do not lose power by asking for advice, you gain respect.

We may not know our own limitations well, but I promise you they are more clear to others than we realize, especially those who live or work closely with us.

Advice may not change your course, but it will guide and inform it.

The hardest step is the first:

To recognize that we need input from others, and that others may know better in a particular circumstance than we do.

But if we can accept this simple truth, the asking is easy and usually the advice is gladly given.

Joshua worked hard to help make this table for our friends with new twin boys!

These two are buddies.

Our girls got to do some shopping after eating pizza!

So we wait, we listen, we seek advice, and then we act in trust, not in clarity.  

Let me share a great story from a book called Ruthless Trust by Brennan Manning (great book!):

“When John Kavanaugh, the noted and famous ethicist, went to Calcutta, he was seeking Mother Teresa … and more. He went for three months to work at “the house of the dying” to find out how best he could spend the rest of his life.

When he met Mother Teresa, he asked her to pray for him. “What do you want me to pray for?” she replied. He then uttered the request he had carried thousands of miles: “Clarity. Pray that I have clarity.”

“No,” Mother Teresa answered, “I will not do that.” When he asked her why, she said, “Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of.” When Kavanaugh said that she always seemed to have clarity, the very kind of clarity he was looking for, Mother Teresa laughed and said: “I have never had clarity; what I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God.”

Many of us, myself included get paralyzed by fear, especially the fear of failing or making the wrong decision.  Just talk to a college graduate if you have forgotten how this feels.

But if we have learned to wait, learned to listen, learned to seek and receive advice, when the time comes for a decision to be made, our peace is found in trust, not clarity.

Joshua's graduation guitar!

Tasty snacks for Chinese new year!

Proud of these two young men.

Not the trust that all will work out the way I want.

Not trust that bad things won't come or happen.

Not trust that I won't make mistakes (I will).

But trust that God is good, that He loves me, and that He loves every person and creature on this earth, and that in spite of all those things which seem to the contrary, He is able and determined to work for the good in all things.

I can trust my welfare, and the welfare of all the people I care about to Him.

When we believe that, nothing is impossible and paralyzing fear disappears.

Even if we don't know what to do, we can act humbly and boldly.

Because God can be trusted with our mistakes as well as with our successes.

With Love,

Matt & Audrey & Fuzzy Ez